The TV Production Faffing Indicator Scale

As television production becomes ever more cost driven, it becomes increasingly important to assess the level of faffing which takes place during a shoot. Faffing has a direct bearing on programme quality at any particular budget level, and the morale of the crew. With this simple-to-use scale you can assess the level of faffing on any given production to a surprising level of accuracy.

Score
Faffing Level
Scenario

1) Low:- All shooting is as per the script. The director is calm and in control at all times. He has a clear idea of what is to be achieved and the crew understand clearly what is required of them. The talent are well rehearsed and prepared. The shoot wraps early.

2) Medium:- This may well be the first pilot of a new series. The director is a bit excited. The script is being tweaked and a lot of biros and clipboards can be seen in the gallery. The crew are doing their best to help. The talent are a bit confused. The phrase "Can we go again please?" is heard a few times.

3) High:- Director starting to panic, but trying not to show it. The script is being re-written. Experienced members of the crew have started to phone home saying not to wait up. VT seem to have the wrong tapes/timecodes. The PA does not like the director. An enquiry has started as to the whereabouts of the hired equipment. The junior sound assistant has panicked and forgotten who should have which radio mic. The runners are busy adding the finishing touches to a pitch for a light entertainment series which will never be commissioned.

4) Panic driven
Over-run:- Everyone has a different script. The director has lost the plot. The crew are dejected. The talent are angry and starting to make unreasonable demands just for the hell of it. The PA is on Prozac. All the runners seem to have run away. The producer has a haunted look and seems to be looking for sharp objects.

5) Completion
bond takeover:- The clueless idiots have screwed up big time. Very little, if any, useable material has found it's way to tape/air all day. Legal clauses are about to be invoked.

Disclaimer: None of the scenarios described in the scale relate to any production real or imaginary which the author may or may not have worked on. Bear in mind that if you wish to sue me you are in danger of admitting that you think it applies to you, which is of course impossible because you are a consummate professional aren't you?

Score	Faffing Level	Scenario
1)	Low:-	All shooting is as per the script. The director is calm and in control at all times. He has a clear idea of what is to be achieved and the crew understand clearly what is required of them. The talent are well rehearsed and prepared. The shoot wraps early.
2)	Medium:-	This may well be the first pilot of a new series. The director is a bit excited. The script is being tweaked and a lot of biros and clipboards can be seen in the gallery. The crew are doing their best to help. The talent are a bit confused. The phrase "Can we go again please?" is heard a few times.
3)	High:-	Director starting to panic, but trying not to show it. The script is being re-written. Experienced members of the crew have started to phone home saying not to wait up. VT seem to have the wrong tapes/timecodes. The PA does not like the director. An enquiry has started as to the whereabouts of the hired equipment. The junior sound assistant has panicked and forgotten who should have which radio mic. The runners are busy adding the finishing touches to a pitch for a light entertainment series which will never be commissioned.
4)	Panic driven Over-run:-	Everyone has a different script. The director has lost the plot. The crew are dejected. The talent are angry and starting to make unreasonable demands just for the hell of it. The PA is on Prozac. All the runners seem to have run away. The producer has a haunted look and seems to be looking for sharp objects.
5)	Completion bond takeover:-	The clueless idiots have screwed up big time. Very little, if any, useable material has found it's way to tape/air all day. Legal clauses are about to be invoked.